mental-health

Assuming the Worst: How Our Imaginations Can Become Ministry’s Biggest Roadblock

/ Jason Morris / Leave a comment

Have you ever noticed that our imaginations are incredibly creative…especially when we’re filling in information we don’t actually have?

The pastor says, “I think we should change the font in the bulletin.”

Within fifteen minutes, the church rumor mill has translated that into: “We’re getting rid of the bulletin…Traditional worship is over…Next thing you know there will be LED lights, fog machines, laser beams, and the pastor will be preaching in skinny jeans while someone plays electric guitar from the balcony.”

All because…someone suggested a different font.

Now, before we laugh too hard, we’ve all done it. We hear one sentence, fill in the blanks with our own fears, and convince ourselves that our version of the story is the truth.

As Lorelai says to Emily in Gilmore Girls:
Lorelai: “You know what they say when people assume things.”
Emily: “No, what do they say?”
Lorelai: “That…you shouldn’t.”
Emily: “Very clever.”

Emily may have had the last word, but Lorelai wasn’t wrong. And, I’m pretty sure my regular readers are fully aware of what they really say about people who assume things…

To be fair, assumptions are part of being human. They’re actually one of the brain’s shortcuts.

You assume the stove is hot because you’ve been burned before. You assume traffic will be heavy on Friday afternoon. You assume you should probably not pet the bear.

These kinds of assumptions keep us alive. Psychologists call these mental shortcuts or heuristics. Our brains constantly make quick predictions based on previous experience because it saves time and energy.

That’s a gift. Until it isn’t. Because the same brain that helps us avoid touching a hot stove also has another tendency…It often expects the worst.

Researchers have long observed what psychologists call the negativity bias. Our brains naturally pay more attention to threats, bad news, and potential problems than to positive possibilities.

Thousands of years ago, this was helpful. The person who assumed the rustling in the bushes might be a predator generally lived longer than the person who assumed it was a bunny.

But today? That same wiring can wreak havoc in relationships, workplaces, families…and yes, churches.

Instead of asking, “I wonder what they meant?” our brains often jump to, “I know exactly what they meant.” And usually, it’s the least charitable interpretation possible.

Churches are full of wonderful people. Churches are also full of humans. Which means we’re just as susceptible to assumptions as anyone else.

Attendance declines for a season. Instead of asking, “Could God be inviting us to rethink how we make disciples?” we assume, “Well, I guess we’re closing by Christmas.”

Someone proposes a new ministry. Instead of wondering, “Who might this reach?” we assume, “Nobody will come.”

A staff member makes one change. Instead of asking why…we write the rest of the story ourselves and assume they just don’t care about us.

The amazing thing is how often our assumptions escalate. One tiny fact becomes an entire fictional Netflix series.

Here’s the thing about assumptions: They usually aren’t rooted in facts. They’re rooted in fear.

Fear fills empty spaces with worst-case scenarios. Fear whispers: “They’re trying to change everything…They don’t care anymore…Why didn’t they ask me…This ministry will never work…I’m probably not welcome.”

Fear is an incredibly gifted storyteller. The only problem? It’s often a terrible fact-checker.

This may be the most dangerous part. Sometimes assumptions don’t stay inside our own heads. They become conversations.
“Well, I heard…I bet what’s happening is…I’m sure they’re planning to…”

Before long, we’re discussing stories that nobody has actually verified. We aren’t spreading facts. We’re spreading guesses. And guesses have a remarkable ability to create unnecessary conflict.

James reminds us to be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.” It’s hard to do that when we’ve already convinced ourselves we know the ending.

Assumptions don’t just create conflict. They rob us.

We assume someone is unfriendly…when they’re actually shy.

We assume someone isn’t interested…when they’re simply waiting to be invited.

We assume a Bible study will be boring…and miss the conversation that could change our lives.

We assume the service project isn’t for us…and miss discovering a passion we never knew we had.

We assume a new person “probably wants to be left alone”…and they leave wondering why nobody spoke to them.

How many friendships have never started because someone assumed the other person wasn’t interested? How many ministries never gained momentum because people assumed they wouldn’t matter? How many possibilities has God placed before us that we’ve walked right past because we assumed the outcome before taking the first step?

One of the remarkable things about Jesus is how often He asked questions. He certainly knew people’s hearts. Yet He still invited conversation.

“What are you looking for?”
“What do you want me to do for you?”
“Who do you say that I am?”

Questions create connection. Assumptions create distance.

Questions invite understanding. Assumptions write someone else’s story for them.

So, here are some suggestions to help us in the area of assumptions…

Pause Before You Fill in the Blanks: When you notice yourself writing a story in your head, stop. Ask yourself: “Do I actually know this…or am I making it up?” Those are two very different things.

Ask Before You Assume: Most misunderstandings could disappear with one simple sentence: “Can you help me understand?” Curiosity is almost always healthier than certainty.

Choose the Most Generous Explanation: What if, instead of assuming bad motives, we assumed good intentions? Not because people are perfect. But because grace begins by giving one another the benefit of the doubt.

That one shift alone could transform marriages, friendships, church meetings, committee conversations, and social media comment sections. (Okay…maybe not social media. But it’s worth trying.)

Imagine a church where people asked questions instead of assuming motives. Where curiosity replaced suspicion. Where conversations replaced rumors. Where hope replaced fear. Where every new idea wasn’t viewed as a threat but as a chance to wonder: “Could God be doing something new among us?”

Isaiah reminds us that God says, “See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?”

Sometimes we don’t perceive it because we’ve already assumed it can’t be true.

Perhaps one of the greatest spiritual disciplines we can practice isn’t having all the answers. Perhaps it’s refusing to invent answers we don’t have.

The next time your imagination starts racing because someone changed the bulletin font…Take a breath. Ask a question. Assume the best until you have a reason not to.

You just might discover that what looked like a crisis was actually an invitation. And what you assumed was the end of the story…was really just the beginning.

    The Short Answer Is…”Because I Follow in the Way of Jesus”

    / Jason Morris / Leave a comment

    News of the low-barrier, 24/7 homelessness resource center planned for downtown Fort Wayne has been circulating throughout our fine city. The stories, questions, and concerns have recently increased as a city councilman voiced some concerns. When Downtown Fort Wayne released their concerns inviting the city to pump the brakes, more rumors, questions and concerns have risen.

    As the most direct neighbor to the proposed location, I have been able to meet with officials from the city on multiple occassions to hear about the proposal, ask questions, and have my concerns addressed. After these meetings, I am lending my support to this project.

    Some expressing concern have implied that this proposed center is inviting a “problem” into the area. I would invite those folks to come spend just 45-minutes with me at 300 E. Wayne Street as they will quickly see that this is actually a response to an existing issue, not the creation of a new one. Also, let us remember that this “problem” is someone’s son, daughter, brother, sister, friend, our neighbor.

    I would also like to remind folks who are saying this location will prevent development that it is right across the street from the Rescue Mission. It’s not like they are proposing to put this next to the development near the riverfront. It’s across the street from existing homeless services and less than a block from a low to no income healthcare facility (Matthew 25).

    If we wait for the ideal location, we will never make progress. There will never be a “perfect” location for this type of facility. But, placing it in an area that is already serving this population makes sense.

    With this blog, I’m including two statements I prepared to express my support this cause. For those who don’t want to read through the message, here’s the short answer. I’m supporting this project because I am committed to following in the way of Jesus (you know, the One who made time and space for the hungry, sick, thirsty, isolated, lonely, disturbed, unsheltered, outcasts, marginalized and vulnerable).

    Here’s a letter of support I wrote:

    To Whom It May Concern,

    As the Lead Pastor of First Wayne Street United Methodist Church in downtown Fort Wayne, I write to offer my support for the proposed low-barrier, 24/7 resource center for our unhoused neighbors.

    For years, our congregation has been deeply engaged in ministry alongside individuals experiencing homelessness, poverty, and addiction. We regularly encounter neighbors who, for one reason or another, are unable to access existing shelters or service agencies. Some are turned away due to capacity limits. Others do not meet intake requirements. Still others struggle with mental health or substance use challenges that make participation in structured programs difficult.

    At present, we have no consistent place to refer these individuals, especially outside of standard business hours. A 24/7, low-barrier facility would provide an essential referral option, ensuring that when someone shows up at our doors, we are not left with no safe alternative to offer. The ability to connect people to care immediately would be a tremendous asset to both churches and community partners.

    We also recognize that a facility of this nature may draw individuals who are actively struggling with addiction or untreated mental health challenges. As a downtown congregation with children, youth, and elderly adults regularly participating in worship services, recovery groups, and community programming, we take safety concerns seriously. Increased presence and security are important considerations, and we are grateful that the proposed plan includes monitoring and oversight of the property. Knowing that the facility will have structured supervision, clear policies, and coordination with community partners helps alleviate many of our primary concerns as a direct neighbor.

    At the same time, we must be honest: the need for this center outweighs the concerns.

    Every day, we see the human cost of inadequate access to shelter and resources. We see neighbors sleeping in unsafe places. We see people cycling through emergency rooms, jails, and temporary solutions. We see the exhaustion of those trying to navigate a system that often feels inaccessible or overwhelming. A 24/7 resource center represents a practical and compassionate step toward stability, coordination, and dignity.

    As a congregation rooted in the Wesleyan tradition, responding to the needs of our marginalized and vulnerable neighbors is not optional. It is central to our calling. While we will be direct neighbors, sharing the same city block, taking a “not in my backyard” approach is not consistent with our faith or our mission. We believe that communities are strengthened when we invest in thoughtful, well-managed solutions that care for those on the margins.

    This proposed center is not a cure-all. But it is a hopeful step forward. It signals that our city is willing to acknowledge the growing need and respond with intentionality and compassion. With clear collaboration, responsible oversight, and ongoing communication, we believe this facility can become a stabilizing presence that benefits both its participants and the broader downtown community.

    Thank you for your leadership and for your willingness to address complex challenges with courage and vision. First Wayne Street United Methodist Church stands ready to continue partnering in efforts that reflect the best of who we are as a city…compassionate, collaborative, and committed to the dignity of every person.

    Here’s a brief statement I wrote for a local news outlet:

    This is a defining moment for Fort Wayne and we need to be honest about what’s at stake.

    Right now, people in our community are suffering in plain sight. They are sleeping outside, being turned away from shelters, cycling through systems that were never designed to truly help them and too often, we’ve learned to look the other way. That is not just unfortunate. It is unacceptable.

    Let’s be clear: the real crisis is not this facility. The real crisis is our willingness to tolerate human beings living and dying without dignity.

    A 24/7, low-barrier resource center is not some extreme idea. It is the bare minimum of what compassion requires. If we find ourselves more concerned about inconvenience than we are about human life, then we have lost our moral compass.

    As a church, we reject the idea that faith means staying comfortable while others suffer. That is not the way of Jesus. We are called to show up, to stand with those on the margins, and to build a community where no one is disposable.

    So yes, there are concerns, but there is also a deeper question: who are we going to be?

    This is our moment to choose courage over fear, compassion over apathy, and dignity over neglect. And we should not hesitate.