For some reason, I have found myself thinking about my two favorite horrible Christian songs.Yes, I understand how that sounds…”favorite” and “horrible”???
Many of my readers know exactly the kind of song I’m talking about. These songs are generally performed by artists like Carmen, Stryper, One Bad Pig, or sing about butterflies and rainbows.
However, my two favorite horrible Christian songs are recorded by unknown artists.
The first is featured on a CD that accompanies a bedtime devotional that we use with our girls. Each night, we have a short time of reading, prayer, and a song. The songs are generally the kind of songs one would hear at the typical vacation Bible school.
However, there is one that is just hilarious. I’m not sure that it’s intentional…but it is brilliant! The song starts off with these lyrics,
I want to throw up
I want to throw up
I want to throw up…my hands and praise the Lord!
How awesome is that? My kids laugh, probably because their parents are laughing, but still…they laugh. It is my considered opinion that this isn’t really the reaction the songwriter had in mind.
Whenever I hear this tune, I find myself thinking, “Exactly! I want to throw up too!” In all honesty, I’ve been tempted to use this song in worship on a Sunday morning just to see how others would respond! It makes me wonder if Weird Al is now making Christian music.
My other favorite horrible Christian song is actually my all-time favorite horrible Christian song. The song starts with the recording “artist” talking about how Philippians 1:21 says, “For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.” As the song progresses, she makes it to the chorus, which is where it gets really good. She sings,
To live is Christ
To die is gain
So kill me, kill me, kill me
Kill me, kill me, kill me
I tend to sing the “kill me, kill me, kill me” part whenever I am annoyed, bored, etc.
Of course, at the end of the day, I really wish people would simply stop making such horrible Christian music. Sure, the person is probably trying to do their best to bring glory to God. However, I’m convinced there are times when God doesn’t want anything to do with some of the things being done in His name. I believe it was Matthew Paul Turner who wrote about a Christian artist sharing a song with him that “wasn’t hers…it was given to her by the Holy Spirit.” His response was something along the lines of “I’m pretty sure that wasn’t the Holy Spirit that gave that piece of junk to you.” Just because it quotes Scripture or uses words like “God”, “Jesus”, “holy”, etc doesn’t mean it’s bringing glory to God or inspired by the Holy Spirit.
I believe we need to be wise as we discern what does and does not bring glory to God. Maybe I’m totally wrong here. Maybe I’m being too critical. Maybe I’m just being a jerk. Or, maybe I’d just like to see the things being done in God’s name be worthy of being done in His name.
So, Christian songwriters, please, make it stop!
Tuesdays with Morris 
I was charmed that you and your wife laugh with the girls. Certainly I am not versed in Christian song writing and different songs may speak to different people in different ways, but I do know that when I am mouthing the words in worship or in my home like: ‘Let my life be the proof of your love. . . If I . . . . . . . – but I don’t love, I am bankrupt’ and ‘I stand amazed at who you are Ohhh’ and “everlasting, your light will shine when all else fades, never ending. . .I give you control . . .’ I am praying for the Holy Spirit to change my life. Thank you for your honesty and your reminder to glorify God. I don’t love all the Christian music I hear but some moves me to tears, brokenness, gratitude and joy.
Holley,
I totally agree…some Christian music has powerful, moving lyrics. There are some choruses and hymns that touch me whenever I hear them. And, then, there are others where I just have to laugh.